The Collect Call of the Cthulhu

"I have a tank full of gentle cuttlefish."

2009-12-22T23:37:30Z

Well, continued my wholesale looting of someone else’s designs, and got the legs and waist of a rather swank mech built. Who knows, I may even get the whole thing built and start modifying it to create a basic frame. Truth be told, the original design is nice, but looks far too like a Gunman for my liking. I want to remove the ApocaLego elements, make the basic design as generic as possible, and then adapt this new generic mech for other themes. Like Power Miners. Or Pirates.

Yeah, that’s the real, hah, highlight of the day. I did get my Direct Hit in TF2, though. That was fun to use for a bit, and it’s certainly an upgrade for me. I’m just getting far too much mileage out of the Eyelander/Targe combo for the Demoman to really get into another class right now.

"HEADS"

2009-12-21T23:23:36Z

Today was another dreary day at the office, with the added thrill of actually getting to work being akin to an obstacle course with the slush and ice everywhere. Sooner or later a lot of that will clear up, making my life a hell of a lot easier.

My TF2 stuff is still floating in the ether, or rather, my Direct Hit is. I had a fiddle with Walkway, but the ability to use my damned Direct Hit would be nice. I look forward to using it on Heavies.

Managed to see the first episode of the fourth season of The Venture Brothers. It took a few moments for me to get just what was going on, but it’s a blast. Also, more Colonel Hunter Gathers is always welcome.

"Maybe I like the misery!"

2009-12-20T23:09:00Z

Well, TF2 hasn’t resolved itself entirely, but I got the Buff Banner and the full set of Demoman equipment. ‘cept now he’s less of a Demoman, and more of a Berserker. Against Heavies it’s not a valid strategy, but it works surprisingly well against weaker targets in confined spaces.

I did feck-all else today. The weather is a bit restrictive in these conditions.

And it seems Rage Against The Machine has won the Christmas Number One. Killing In The Name isn’t exactly my favourite song, but at least it has a bit of passion, a bit of life to it. The reality TV show pap they got was a soulless cover of a Miley Cyrus song (Good Lord, could it get any worse?), so it makes it even better. Nice to see Cowell’s televised karaoke get a damned good kicking.

Meh

2009-12-19T23:52:42Z

Well, TF2 kicked off again, but Valve soured my enjoyment by fucking over the Achievement Unlocks. Oh, you unlocked your equipment? We could give you it so you’ll be on a level playing field, but no, we’re not going to bother. Maybe on Monday. Maybe, just maybe, they could leave off the freeloader weekends until a week or so after a major content patch. Because crap like this happens every fucking time.
I honestly get the feeling I should have just played WoW instead, as at least when you work toward an item, you actually get it, instead of fulfilling all the requirements for it and getting given the proverbial finger. As guess what, I worked towards getting my Anvil of Titans, and then I got it. It’s crazy, I know.

"HE IS A POISON TO THE PRO-SAURIAN MOVEMENT."

2009-12-18T23:20:56Z

Good Lord I’m tired. I think the cold did get to me, since last night I slept in my dressing gown and socks. And whilst getting in wasn’t that hard, getting back was a bit harder as all that snow had formed into ice. Balls. It’ll only get worse.

TF2 happened, but Valve seemed to have dropped the ball in regards to item unlocks, with people unable to access and modify their personal inventories. The Equaliser in particular is one of my favourite new pieces of kit, given that a Soldier running faster than a Scout and caving in the skulls of Medics is always a surprise.

"I really like those sequined shirts."

2009-12-17T23:13:38Z

And so the snow, foretold by prophets in days of yore, is in the process of fucking up the transport networks of the UK. Hooray. I have a sneaking suspicion there will just be me in the office tomorrow.

Not a lot of much else going on. QI was depressingly “meh” this week, and I didn’t do a great deal this evening. So I’ll just call it a night and odds are the snow will be gone by the morning, turned into irritating freezing slush.

"BARROWMAN!"

2009-12-16T22:48:25Z

Today was filled from front to back with soul-crushing tedium.

Yeah, that’s all I got. I just want to curl up from the cold and sleep. That being said, Clerks and The Thing arrived from LoveFilm. So I should have something to watch over the Annual Gift Period.

I really don’t have anything to talk about. I know that hasn’t stopped me for the last year or so, but it really has been such a boring day. Good Lord, even the quick glimmer of snow wasn’t terribly exciting.

"I think that hairstyle should win the Turner Prize."

2009-12-15T23:33:22Z

Well, I had a quiet evening. I fiddled with a Lego hardsuit/robot I’ve been toying with, but whilst the skeleton of the limbs is in place, it still needs to be filled out. Maybe get it to be a bit… stompier.

I managed to finish watching Season 3 of The Venture Brothers. The show continues to be a hell of a lot of fun, I just wish the DVDs would show up in the UK.

Sent off some… stuff. To… people. Including one who lives in the Colonies. I hope they enjoy what I sent them, given how much the damned thing cost to ship there. For £8 it better get there yesterday, delivered by Oscar Wilde in a clockwork robot suit.

And it seems the Demoman is getting a sword and shield. Good, I needed target practice.

"Robo, do you know this rock ? And how much does it hate you?"

2009-12-14T23:42:23Z

Urgh. Still tired. I managed to get the wrapping done, so I’ll send those parcels out tomorrow.

Fiddled with the numerous Lego parts upon my desk. Trying to build myself a big clunky robot that has a tiny minifig head. Quite possibly in a dome. If the idea works, I may adapt it for other themes, but right now I’m going for an Agents Mech.

Beyond that, not a lot going on. May try out a Shammy for a bit, to get a feel for one for when I can create a Dwarf one.

"The Queen is dressed differently because she is the goal-keeper."

2009-12-13T23:03:19Z

Urgh, tired. Headache. Feh.

TF2 didn’t really kick off, but the news of them adding crafting is certainly interesting. Who knows, I may even get myself a Professional’s Panama.

Tried out the Random Dungeon Finder on WoW. I got myself Exalted with the Argent Crusade, and got a chance to run the Forge of Souls. A nice and easy run, with almost no problems whatsoever. Shame there was no loot for me. Maybe when I get a chance to see the Halls of Reflection I’ll get that kick-arse sword.

And another week of boredom and irritation await me. Joy of fucking joys.

"Is that not a... tiny bit dodgy?"

2009-12-12T23:45:25Z

Another dull and wasted weekend. Had a wander around the shops, although it was hardly worth the effort. Couldn’t anywhere else, what with the traffic and the seething masses of morons.

TF2 happened, although it wasn’t especially lively for very long. Hopefully the release of more specific information on the Soldier and Demoman equipment will bring more back.

Feh, balls to this. I’m off to bed.

"HANS! Pack it in you weird freak!"

2009-12-11T22:27:16Z

I think I’m no longer a gamer. I reached this when I realised the only game that’s really excited me recently (Even as a potential release) was Torchlight, and the forthcoming titles for the DS and 360 just don’t excite me. The closest to it is Crackdown 2, and even then, it’s a title I’ll get later and not at launch.
I mean, I play WoW, I dabble in TF2 and have been recently snared by Torchlight, but beyond that? TF2 exists, for me, as a chatroom with explosions. It’s glorified IM, and little else. WoW is just a dirty addiction, and Torchlight was dirt cheap (In an age when even PC games cost £30+) and incredibly simple. A casual game, which perhaps was part of the appeal to me.
But when was the last time I really got excited about a big-name title? Was it GTA IV? But it’s just a never-ending stream of WW2 shooters, modern-day FPS’, SPESH MAHREENZ, mediocre Fantasy MMORPG’s, sports titles, and… eh. I just find nothing of note. I mean, I occasionally gaze wistfully at the PS3 and Uncharted and Ratchet and Clank and similar, but it’s not exactly abundant and fruitful over there, either. And I’m certainly not going to drop £250 on the ability to play Calling All Cars.
I dunno. I just find so little out there that grabs me, or excites me. It’s just so… stagnant. Textbook design, cookie-cutter mechanics, executed on the cheap to make the release date for the multinational publisher run by an inhuman devil-man. I think things like Steam will help, but the console market seems like it really is crammed full of trash. Hopefully, hopefully, I’ll be proven wrong. But there’s just barely anything that makes me want to go out of my way to buy it, or even play it.

Very dull day, and I think I came to that realisation when I browsed the forthcoming games for the numerous systems in the hope of finding something to fill the leisure hours with. And then getting a bit down when I came up empty-handed.

I also found out in the midst of TF2, as the server reflected the current state of every other server (Demomen vs. Soldiers), I discovered how terrible I am at playing a Demoman.

"I dunno, arresting a Tory MP is pretty useful."

2009-12-10T23:18:10Z

Good Lord I’m still tired. So very tired.

I also rediscovered how patently awful I am at New Super Mario Brothers.

More Torchlight, more WoW. Not much else to say, really. I just have done bugger all, all damned day. Coupled with being shattered, I just can’t be bothered with this tonight.

"Or just shot... with a guitar."

2009-12-09T23:09:19Z

No, I don’t have much to add.

A new patch for WoW, so all my addons are broken, and I need to fix my interface. Despite that, it runs smoother and a few additions to gameplay are rather nice. Gitfinda then took out bloody vengeance on the Gronn of Blades Edge. It was good to beat the tar out of those fuckers after all this time. Next stop? The Fel Reaver. Six-kay crits, motherfucker.

Work was tedious. Incredibly so.

I now have sentry guns in Torchlight. Okay, Flechette Traps. Which act and sound exactly like sentry guns. Sentry guns powered by magic.

"Oh, and I bit a man's face off."

2009-12-08T22:34:49Z

Well, I finally, finally got the last part of actual armour for Gitfinda in WoW, the legplates. And then blew a fortune on epic gems for the kit. Just the neck, rings, trinkets and cape and he’ll be epic’d out. There is the Sigil, but bollocks to it, the PvP ones for that are shite.

I think I’m sated on Torchlight for now. That may change after I give the Destroyer a proper airing. But I’m not getting the pangs for running the dungeon like I felt two days ago.

And apparently Dave doesn’t like the f word, despite it being after ten. Buggers.

"NO! Middle-Class Undead!"

2009-12-07T22:34:36Z

Gods, I’m jonesin’ for a fix of Torchlight.

EN’s running again, which is nice. Eastwood seems to have stolen my bag, though. Bloody cartoon foxes.

Headed out despite the insane hordes of marauding shoppers, and managed to get what I had to get. Which was nice, but I had to pull out of visiting Lakeside for this purpose given the traffic toward that end of the world was absolutely fucking insane. Still, that’s one less problem to deal with. Go me!

"See your favourite vase? That's how evil I am!"

2009-12-06T22:12:15Z

So yeah, another lazy Sunday. Somewhat justified in that there was no way in hell I was going to get anywhere, given the pandemonium everywhere that isn’t soggy. The shops are at capacity point with people buying shit for people they don’t really like, which makes me buying shit for myself somewhat difficult.

I watched Russell Howard’s first standup DVD, and whilst it was funny, there was a lot of stuff from Mock The Week. He’s still funny and cheerful, which makes it worth watching, but if you watch a lot of reruns on Dave, only rent it if you’re bored.

And that’s all I got. Hopefully next week will be more exciting. Hah.

"Oh shit, I thought I dreamt that part!"

2009-12-05T23:56:42Z

Torchlight is horrifying. I keep finding myself delving back into it, getting progressively loot. My Vanquisher got a rather swank epic handgun. And the hordes of spider-bosses seem to be getting larger. Explosive Shot is obscene, especially against hordes of mooks, with a fair few suffering critical existence failure, reducing around a dozen goblins to a smear of blood. Ricochet, well, it cuts through mooks like a hot knife through butter.

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

"This feels like the end of a dinner party."

2009-12-04T21:50:21Z

Well, I jumped back into Torchlight, because, well, I’m a madman. And it’s an addiction. A dirty, filthy addiction. I rolled up a Vanquisher, the ranged DPS class (Who also has bewbs) and going full-on gunslinger is rather nice.

I was directed to an entirely legitimate source for the later seasons of The Venture Brothers, and proceeded to watch them whilst I had little to do at work. I can only express my regret for not getting into this sooner. Whilst I’ve had the first season for a while (And watched it, and professed my enjoyment for it), it’s a shame that UK fans have… a slightly more difficult time seeing the later seasons at their leisure.

Also, just watching the new season of Live At The Apollo on BBC1. One day someone will tell me why Michael Macintyre is funny, because I find him an annoying middle-class tit.

"The Lynx man has no respect for the war dead."

2009-12-03T22:45:05Z

Well, I finished Torchlight. At least, I finished the main quest. That being to seek out and murder Ordak, the large and unpleasant demon-thing lurking on the bottom floor of the dungeons under Torchlight. This then opens up the infinite dungeon, which is nice.

In other fun news, a copy of A Fistful of Dollars is on the way to my door. It’ll be something to watch this weekend.

I could go on about today’s little tale of bankers, but frankly, balls to it. I’m far too irritable.

"Do they still have sandwiches there?"

2009-12-02T23:17:54Z

Torchlight, Torchlight, Torchlight. It’s a beautiful and addictive drug, amusing given the nature of the plotholium rocks (Ember) in the game. Butchered my way to a new set of flash gear (Going back to twin wands, as I unlocked a unique one), and once again cut a swathe through goblins, zombies, constructs and those bloody goblin hounds. And butchered a fair few bosses on the way, unlocking the Beam Golem (Bringing my army to a grand total of eight).
It’s just far, far too good at what it does. And what it does is feed your primal need to kill things miles beneath the surface of the Earth for money.

"Damnit, will you stop doing that!"

2009-12-01T20:31:56Z

Once again, I delved deep into Torchlight, taking on an alleged boss and evaporating him in a few seconds flat. The trouble is that whilst I’m on “easy”, and as such, things tend to die the moment I or my hordes of minions look at them cock-eyed, thanks to the Alchemist Death Ray (Ember Beam, arguably one of the most disgustingly overpowered abilities in the entire game), it does feel a bit… too simple. So I dropped the wands in favour of a pair of enchanted handguns, if only to mix things up.

Beyond the wonderful depths of Torchlight, I’ve decided to finally actually watch Star Trek. You know, the film. The new film. It’s pretty promising so far, and the effects are pretty swank. In the great geeky schism I was always a Wars man (Before defecting to Firefly when the Great Whedon showed us the True Way), but given this comfortably ignores what has happened before, I’m happy to give it a whirl.

And for those who care, I bought myself a Lego Pirates Advent Calendar, and today behind the door was… A Pirate Captain with cutlass. Yarrr.

"I've got a leopard at home."

2009-11-30T22:39:52Z

More Torchlight. The game is frighteningly addictive. I unlocked the Ember Beam spell for my Alchemist, and it’s essentially a death-ray. A death-ray that burns through people, zombies, spiders, golems and pygmies. Well worth the investment.

Beyond that, a very dull day at work, given that there was no work to do.

"It had a man in it, called Roy."

2009-11-29T19:25:51Z

So I haven’t done quite so much today. Quite possibly because I downloaded the Torchlight demo, and on the strength of what I had seen, caved in and bought it. It’s essentially everything you liked about Diablo (And one thing perhaps you didn’t like) distilled into a fine and wondrous thing. For example, whilst there are three classes, there are plenty of “classless” spells you can give yourself or your pet, and everyone can equip any piece of equipment as long as their stats match up. For example, my Alchemist can use a stave, or a pair of handguns, or even… dual-wielding wands.
It’s just… wonderful. A single-player dungeon-crawler like Diablo, but turned all the way up to eleven.
What works best is perhaps the fact the game is fast. I sometimes like going back in WoW and doing the earlier dungeons, racking up the kills from dozens of mobs. Torchlight does that, and far, far better.

Torchlight has even drained my urge to play WoW. It’s a frightening thing. And a veritable steal at £14.99.

"How very Geoff Hoon."

2009-11-28T22:23:42Z

For those who have just started reading this on some mad whim, or those who’ve been reading this for the past year but have failed to catch onto the fact, I’m an atheist. Very much so. But I’m not a dick about it, or at least, I like to think I’m not a dick about it. For you see, I really don’t care what people believe. I think it’s a fundamental right to have freedom of belief, so the idea that people out there are Christian or Muslim or Jew or the Church of Starry Wisdom doesn’t offend me. So, we’ve that out of the way. But this isn’t a rant about how stupid or foolish or silly people of a religious bend are (Because if they are or aren’t isn’t of any concern to me). Or rather, one particular flavour of them.
I find the idea of knocking on doors, selling your religion like double-glazing or tarmaccing for the driveway, absolutely disgusting. I’m often told by those of faith, without the ability to keep it to themselves, that religion is a wonderful, enlightening and magnificent thing that brings light and purpose to their life. And to me, that’s fair enough. What I do object to is forcing it down other people’s throats on the streets, like the usual nutcase with the loudhailer to the Mormon fellows in cheap suits and bad hair via the fundamentalist churches with younger members proclaiming that a murderer who has found Jesus is more likely to get into Heaven than an atheist who devotes his life to good works for the sake of good works instead of any heavenly reward, and more importantly, those who knock on your door.
It’s a quiet street, and I have a dog who tends to go nuts when you hear a tap at the door. It’s bad enough when the kebab house leaflets or free papers get shoved through the letter box, and barely tolerable when it’s the postman or a pizza delivered by some poor sod in the howling rain. So when you have some poor kid who looks like he’d rather either be sleeping or playing football with his friends in an uncomfortable suit and his presumed father trying to shill Jesus to me like the Christian faith was nothing more than getting the windows on the porch done.
So yeah. Something that was sitting on my mind after I got a knock at the door from a pack of god-botherers.

As you can tell from the rather long-winded nature of the above, I have had a lot of free time today. In particular, I got up early and went into town to pick up my course materials from the Post Office, had breakfast at the Golden Arches, had a coffee, and came home. It was barely quarter-past ten.

The rest of the day was taken up by the usual hit of Warcraft, and watching the second disc of Gurren Lagann. It’s wonderful show, but sadly they stretched the content out over as many discs as possible. If anything, I get the feeling they’d put a single episode on a disc and charge £25 a throw if they could. But the twenty-seven episode run would cost you £75(!) to buy in an entirely legitimate fashion. Which is, let’s be honest, obscene. I can pick up the entire fucking run of The Sopranos, which is eighty-six fifty-minute (Seventy-one hours of entertainment) episodes for £60. Even assuming you double the Gurren Lagann episode count to make up for the dubbed and original soundtracks, The Sopranos still gives you more, well, value. That’s not a slander on Gurren Lagann at all, from what I’ve seen it’s fan-fucking-tastic, and I’d happily buy the entire run. But not for £75. And as much as LoveFilm helps in that regard, the wait between blocks of four or five episodes is a pain in the arse.